The smell of changing seasons

[Diamons&Rust]

I doubt that I´ll ever be as happy
as the people who pass by
They smile and they joke and they stare at me
´Cause they know I wanna ask "why?"

I feel like a poet I guess writing and singing
Is all that I should do
But I´d never admit that in public
´cause self-confidence is a feeling
I was never really subscribed to

Ones real life is often a life
One does not lead
That´s so true that being called a thief now
would be fine with me

I put on a recorded of the saddest singer
This empty room has ever heard
I´m so in love, you wouldn´t believe it
How I cherish every word

I´ll tell you that I like writing
Maybe that´s a start

"I live of the smell of changing seasons"

You shall not be afraid
that would be good start

At the end of the day no one will weigh your heart
At the end of the day
No one
No one
No one
No one
At the end of the day
No one
Will Weigh
Your heart

 

[desgraca]

du machst keine fehler in dem sinn, bloß die formulierungen holpern teils ein bisschen....sehr viele "that" am satzanfang, das klingt gesungen recht unschön...





I doubt that I´ll ever be as happy
as the people who pass by
They smile and they joke and they stare at me
´Cause they know I wanna ask "why?"

I feel like a poet I guess writing and singing
Is all that I should do
But I´d never admit that in public
´cause self-confidence is a feeling
I was never really subscribed to

Ones real life is often a life
One does not lead
der sinn is supergenial, nur die formulierung hakt...
ones wird gaaaaanz selten benutzt,,,,,
evtl. "your real life is often the life you dont lead"
"our real life is often the life we do not lead"
That´s so true that being called a thief now
would be fine with me

I put on a recorded of the saddest singer
a record
This empty room has ever heard
I´m so in love, you wouldn´t believe it
evtl. -it
How I cherish every word

I´ll tell you that I like writing
-that
Maybe that´s a start

"I live off the smell of changing seasons"
yeah

You shall not be afraid
should
oder don't be afraid
"you shall not" ist ne bibelformulierung
that would be good start

At the end of the day no one will weigh your heart
At the end of the day
No one
No one
No one
No one
At the end of the day
No one
Will Weigh
Your heart

ich find deine texte soooo klasse....

 

[desgraca]

hm, vielleicht doch nochmal ein paar stil-aufmotzungs-vorschläge...also das grüne dann quasi...



I doubt that I´ll ever be as happy
-that
as the people who pass by
They smile and they joke and they stare at me
´Cause they know I wanna ask "why?"
ask me "why"

I feel like a poet I guess writing and singing
Is all that I should do
is all i should do
But I´d never admit that in public
´cause self-confidence is a feeling
I was never really subscribed to
sehr geile zeile

Ones real life is often a life
One does not lead
der sinn is supergenial, nur die formulierung hakt...
ones wird gaaaaanz selten benutzt,,,,,
evtl. "your real life is often the life you dont lead"
"our real life is often the life we do not lead"
That´s so true that being called a thief now
evtl. this is so true that
und evtl. "that if you called me a thief now, it would be fine with me"
would be fine with me

I put on a recorded of the saddest singer
a record
This empty room has ever heard
I´m so in love, you wouldn´t believe it
evtl. -it
How I cherish every word

I´ll tell you that I like writing
-that
Maybe that´s a start

"I live off the smell of changing seasons"
yeah

You shall not be afraid
should
oder don't be afraid
"you shall not" ist ne bibelformulierung
that would be good start

At the end of the day no one will weigh your heart
At the end of the day
No one
No one
No one
No one
At the end of the day
No one
Will Weigh
Your heart

 

[Diamons&Rust]

hm, vielleicht doch nochmal ein paar stil-aufmotzungs-vorschläge...also das grüne dann quasi...



I doubt that I´ll ever be as happy
-that
as the people who pass by
They smile and they joke and they stare at me
´Cause they know I wanna ask "why?"
ask me "why"

I feel like a poet I guess writing and singing
Is all that I should do
is all i should do
But I´d never admit that in public
´cause self-confidence is a feeling
I was never really subscribed to
sehr geile zeile

Ones real life is often a life
One does not lead
der sinn is supergenial, nur die formulierung hakt...
ones wird gaaaaanz selten benutzt,,,,,
evtl. "your real life is often the life you dont lead"
"our real life is often the life we do not lead"
Ich finde diesen Satz auch unfassbar genial, allerdings ist er leider
nicht von mir sondern von Oscar Wilde. Deswegen auch die
nächste Zeile mit dem thief
That´s so true that being called a thief now
evtl. this is so true that
und evtl. "that if you called me a thief now, it would be fine with me"
Das ist gut, ich glaub das übernehm ich
would be fine with me

I put on a recorded of the saddest singer
a record Oh, klar. Tippfehler
This empty room has ever heard
I´m so in love, you wouldn´t believe it
evtl. -it -it?
How I cherish every word

I´ll tell you that I like writing
-that
Maybe that´s a start

"I live off the smell of changing seasons"
yeah

You shall not be afraid
should
oder don't be afraid
"you shall not" ist ne bibelformulierung
Oh, das ist gut zu wissen... Hab das immer blos für ne "altertümliche"
Formulierung gehalten
that would be good start

At the end of the day no one will weigh your heart
At the end of the day
No one
No one
No one
No one
At the end of the day
No one
Will Weigh
Your heart

 

[desgraca]

schade eigentlich dass ich oscar wilde nich erkannt hab, ich mag den voll
aber mit dem wissen ists auf einmal auch sehr passend, dass er es abstrakt formuliert hat, das macht eigentlich schon klar, dass es ein philosophisches fremdzitat ist (wenn man sich nich gar so ignorant anstellt wie ich )

 

[x-Riff]

Ich finde Du hast wirklich eine Ader für Texte.

Du bekommst eine sehr seltene und sehr schöne Mischung aus Erzählung, Fließen, Tiefe und gelungenen Formulierungen hin.

Dass Deine Themen um das Schreiben, das Leben eines Schreibenden, sein Innenleben und die Welt drumrum geht - ich denke, das ist einfach das, was Dich beschäftigt und Du hast eine Fähigkeit, das ohne die bedrückende Welt- oder Selbstanklage und jenseits von Seicht- oder allzu großer Abgründigkeit hinzubekommen.

Besonders gut gefällt mir der Schluss - selbst wenn´s ein Zitat sein sollte ...

Wie sieht´s denn mit der Umsetzung aus?

Go ahead.

x-Riff

 

[Diamons&Rust]

Dankeschön. MIt dem Schluß bin ich auch sehr glücklich- und, nein, das ist kein Zitat
Ich weiss zwar schon in welche Richtung es Musikalisch gehen soll, aber an der Umsezung haperts noch... Momentan bin ich auf der Suche nach ner Band, weil ich mich ein bischen von meinem früheren Singer/Songwriter Kram entfernen möchte.
Sollte ich aber was fertig haben werd ichs hier posten. x