#43 Heartbreaker

[craenk]

Hab wieder ein wenig mit metaphern gearbeitet und hoffe das kommt gut an
viel freude beim lesen den der text is eher depressiv ^^
freu mich über kritik und ratschläge oder so







Heartbreaker

Standing on the egde
No heart to loose cause I never had
A heart
My heart
Worth a penny
So I have to get ready
Ready to get it over
The life of a heartbreaker

I'm the beloved one who can't love
Want to bring joy over the world
But can't make anyone happy in the end
They call me hero they tell me I'm an angel
Afterwards I'm the luxury mansion you want to sell
I'm an old street musician
Playing lovely songs to hide my pain from society
Give me a warm heart like yours and then -
Please give it to me!

I'm an invisible wall
You can see trough but u can't come over though
You can't break my heartless wall
which is filling my life with anger
I'm the fury in person also the nicest stranger
I'm a wingless bird asking for food
But I'll never be able to get what i want
I mostly reached the edge of my life ..

Standing on the egde
No heart to loose cause I never had
A heart
My heart
Worth a penny
So I have to get ready
Ready to get it over
The life of a heartbreaker

Every single day is anouncing a new torture
Making everyone feel good except of me
Thats the only thing I'm really good for
I want to be happy from the bottom of my heart forever
But I will always be a heartbreaker

~craenk~

 

[craenk]

doch so schlecht ja?

 

[desgraca]

Heartbreaker

Standing on the egde
No heart to lose cause I never had
A heart
My heart
Worth a penny
So I have to get ready
Ready to get it over with
The life of a heartbreaker

I'm the beloved one who can't love
Want to bring joy over the world
But can't make anyone happy in the end
They call me hero they tell me I'm an angel
Afterwards I'm the luxury mansion you want to sell
I'm an old street musician
Playing lovely songs to hide my pain from society
Give me a warm heart like yours and then -
Please give it to me!

I'm an invisible wall
You can see trough but u can't come over though
you can see through, you can't pass it though
You can't break my heartless wall
which is filling my life with anger
besser "that is filling my life with anger"
I'm the fury in person also the nicest stranger
i'm the incarnation/personification of wrath and the nicest stranger
I'm a wingless bird asking for food
But I'll never be able to get what i want
I mostly reached the edge of my life ..
da versteh ich das mostly nicht,,,,
i nearly reached, i've almost reached : ich habe es fast erreicht
most of all, i#ve reached the end of my life: und vorallem habe ich das ende meines lebens erreicht

Standing on the egde
No heart to lose cause I never had
A heart
My heart
Worth a penny
So I have to get ready
Ready to get it over
The life of a heartbreaker
diesen teil find ich uebrigens vergleichweise schwaecher als den rest

Every single day is anouncing a new torture
disclosing a new future
Making everyone feel good except of me
except me
Thats the only thing I'm really good for
I want to be happy from the bottom of my heart forever
But I will always be a heartbreaker

ich find das ok so, muessen meiner meinung nach nicht mehr bilder rein, das konzept und was du ausdruecken willst wird auch klar,,,,an dem refrain kannste ja vielleicht nochn bisschen arbeiten wenn du mags,,,,"no heart to lose cause i never had a heart" klingt halt vergleichsweise plump....ansonsten ist mir nix negativ aufgefallen, einiges find ich ganz schoen beschrieben

 

[craenk]

ich find das ok so, muessen meiner meinung nach nicht mehr bilder rein, das konzept und was du ausdruecken willst wird auch klar,,,,an dem refrain kannste ja vielleicht nochn bisschen arbeiten wenn du mags,,,,"no heart to lose cause i never had a heart" klingt halt vergleichsweise plump....ansonsten ist mir nix negativ aufgefallen, einiges find ich ganz schoen beschrieben

jo danke ja werd das mal ein wenig umschmücken .. refrains waren auch noch nie mein ding.. werde das mal probn .. danke für deine bemühungen