n paar texte von mir - wünsch mir n paar meinungen (Kritik,Lob)

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Saarland - nahe Saarlouis - Heusweiler
hoi leutz, ich bin ja eigentlich kein Sänger, aber der Thread hier scheint mir perfekt um meine selbst geschriebenen Texten zu posten. Wie gesagt, ich würd gerne mal n paar meinungen von euch hören (Kritik - Lob - Tipps etc.)
mir ist schon bewusst, dass ich vllt n paar grammatikfehler, rechtschreibfehler oda so hab...aber die sind eher zweitrangig. wär auf jeden fall cool, wenn ihr mal n paar statements abgeben könntet, wär mir echt wichtig...will ja wissen ,wie meine texte bei anderen leutz ankommen...
fangen wir also an ^^...

You are an absurd person

I learned to use my mouth
when nothing is right
my fists are strong and i rise up
now i'm ready to fight!

REF.:
I'm the one kickin' you down
ev'ry word you say it's only a lie
I'm the one pushin' you down to the ground
my question - are you ready to die?

you stand in front of me
my mouth is my weapon
laughing about your person
laughing about that,you want to be

REF.:
I'm the one kickin' you down
ev'ry word you say it's only a lie
I'm the one pushin' you down to the ground
my question - are you ready to die?

I see your hate in your eyes
but I look at you and I'm calm
your weapon is loaded and you put the trigger
but it'S absurd you can not hurt me

REF.:
I'm the one kickin' you down
ev'ry word you say it's only a lie
I'm the one pushin' you down to the ground
my question - are you ready to die?

I don't want to hurt him


you told me, that you love me
I told you, that I love you
you smiled and said,you're happy
but there is a problem - that's the fuckin' truth

you've another relationship
my best friend loves you
I don't want to hurt him
now I shout out all kinds of shit

Ref.:
friendship, that's the thing we want
it's hard for us, but we should do that
I will never forget your lovely face
but we must leave this kind of place - (kann man vllt falsch verstehen, deshalb will ich meine metapher erklären: mit "kind of place" bezeichne ich den momentanen stand der dinge, zwischen dem mädchen und mir - wir wollen zsm sein, aber es geht halt net...etc.)


many words we spoke
but we didn't know, what we should do
I've made a fault and told you
and you accept my way


Ref.:
friendship, that's the thing we want
it's hard for us, but we should do that
I will never forget your lovely face
but we must leave this kind of place

Obsession
Refr.:
tell me why i should love you
tell me why i should kiss you
all this ignorance to me
tell me why i should be there for you

you wrote many letters
in ev'ry letter you told me,how much you love me
you told me 'bout your life and about your fetters
so tell me,why i should be there

In a dark cold night you told me about your pain
about your cries in ev'ry night
all these morbid thoughts in your brain
so tell me why i should be the light
tell me why i should help you

Refr.:
tell me why i should love you
tell me why i should kiss you
all this ignorance to me
tell me why i should be there for you


kissin' your lips on a sunny day
kissin' your lips by a sunny way
suddenly there was a storm in your brain
all these morbid thoughts
all these stupid words you said
so tell me why i should help you

ev'ry day you told me about your wounds
ev'ry minute this pain inside my head
you couldn't cross your bounds
tell me where i should take the new power for you

Refr.:
tell me why i should love you
tell me why i should kiss you
all this ignorance to me
tell me why i should be there for you


I couldn't believe this
you show me all your lesions
in this second I have lost my bliss
you told me about your obsession
tell me why you do all these things

suddenly you don't tell me something
you don't spend one word for me
all this ignorance to me
so tell me why you love nothing
so tell me why i should love you


Refr.:
tell me why i should love you
tell me why i should kiss you
all this ignorance to me
tell me why i should be there for you

Our music

your're hearing our sounds
our riffs kickin' your asses
our power strikes agains the bounds
and we will revive out of the ashes

Ref.:
Our music is our life
We need that shit for to breath
ev'ry minute we play the songs we feel free
and that's all we want to give you

I count till 3 and we will see you dancin'
one....two...three....DO!


we are here to put a sign
we are here to destroy the normal line
we're here to rock the ground
we're here to see you jumpin' around!

Ref.:
Our music is our life
We need that shit for to breath
ev'ry minute we play the songs we feel free
and that's all we want to give you

I count till 3 and we will see you dancin'
one....two...three....DO!

ev'ry human have his own root
and that is, why our life is so nice
we live our life and show it with our music
so rise you ears open and let's roll the dice

Ref.:
Our music is our life
We need that shit for to breath
ev'ry minute we play the songs we feel free
and that's all we want to give you

I count till 3 and we will see you dancin'
one....two...three....DO!

we destroy the dark clouds in our life
and our music reflect our souls
burnin' flames you see in our eyes
and that is the consequence of our life


Ref.:
Our music is our life
We need that shit for to breath
ev'ry minute we play the songs we feel free
and that's all we want to give you

I count till 3 and we will see you dancin'
one....two...three....DO!

Revolution of my soul

we kissed us for many years
but on one day,it was different
with a dither voice and many tears
you said it to me

"I love you but i must go"
that was the last sentence you said
i catch the gun and put the trigger
and i hit you deadly

Ref.:
I like myself and my life
and ev'rybody who wants to destroy it
I will put him down to the ground
at the bodom he‘ll feeling kicked!

you explain, you've met an other person
an other person completly different from me
i couldn't understand it but i learn and
PUSH YOU AWAY!

Ref.:
I like myself and my life
and ev'rybody who wants to destroy it
I will put him down to the ground
at the bodom he‘ll feeling kicked!

you hurt myself so much and I hate you
but now, there was a revolution of feelings in my soul
I swear to me I will never appoint myself to somebody
no woman should can hurt me

Ref.:
I like myself and my life
and ev'rybody who wants to destroy it
I will put him down to the ground
at the bodom he‘ll feeling kicked!

the revolution is completly finished
my life is only mine
because i won't be punished (anymore)
and that's why I'm here!

Ref.:
I like myself and my life
and ev'rybody who wants to destroy it
I will put him down to the ground
at the bodom he‘ll feeling kicked!

Revolution, revolution


Ref.:
revolution,revolution
we must fight against
- come on -
revolution,revolution
join our opinion!
- come on -


There are fuckin' clouds at the sky of my soul
clouds which covers my mind
i want to destroy the clouds here from the soil
and so i rise my mouth open and don't be blind!

too many humans are blind and shut up
but that's the wrong way
we don't may shut up our mouth
we must say our opinion ev'ry day

Ref.:
revolution,revolution
we must fight against
- come on -
revolution,revolution
join our opinion!
- come on -

we aren't here to feel like slaves
ev'ryone is free and have his own qualities
we give a fuck of your thinking of implicitness
we are individuals and ev'rybody is allowed to live!

Ref.:
revolution,revolution
we must fight against
- come on -
revolution,revolution
join our opinion!
- come on –

Ref.:
revolution,revolution
we must fight against
- come on -
revolution,revolution
join our opinion!
- come on -


jetzt schonmal danke,dass ihr euch das überhaupt durch gelesen habt :great:

so,und jetzt wär ich für n paar statemenst dankbar....

sind n paar sachen vllt übertrieben?versteht man manche textzeilen net? gibs irgendwo keine sinnvollen gedankenverknüpfungen? oda sowas in der art...

danke

mfg
 
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Hi Follow !

Es ist günstiger, Du eröffnest für jeden song einen eigenen thread, sonst wird bald ein Knäul aus verschiedenen comments zu den unterschiedlichen texten entstehen.

x-Riff
 

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